How to resolve stuck sleep patterns
by Heidi Holvoet

We call "stuck sleep patterns" when a baby or toddler sleeps differently from what we expect, at night, and does so consistently for 3 weeks or longer.

Examples of stuck sleep patterns:

😴 Not settling for the night until late (9pm or later)

😴 Waking every 40-50 minutes in the first half of the night

😴 Waking hourly or two-hourly in a regular pattern

😴 Waking 3-5 times a night in a regular pattern

and each of these at ages that don't call for (as many) night wakes to feed, and babies/toddlers who are sufficiently comfortable and healthy that they reasonably could be able to sleep more easily.

Stuck patterns or bad habits?

Stuck patterns are often called 'bad habits' but I don't agree with that and I think it's important to re-frame:

First of all, 'bad habit' is a way too ugly word for a pattern that's maybe been established either naturally or purely because your baby at one point needed help to sleep.

Whether too young and just not mature enough sleep-wise, unwell and needing more feeds and cuddles, a huge developmental leap that was just too big a hurdle to cope on their own sleep-wise, and so on.

All legit reasons to help your baby/toddler, and yourself, get sleep. In an as positive as possible way. (Because almost always, the alternative is not so positive).

Second of all, as your baby's sleep matures in their first 3 years of life, sleep patterns are bound to develop, mature, and yes, get stuck sometimes.

Regardless of what you did or didn't do.

3 must-do steps to resolve stuck sleep patterns

Now, if you feel your baby or toddler struggles with said stuck sleep patterns, and they're at a point now that they, and you, are ready to move on from them,

these are 3 first things to resolve stuck sleep patterns:

1/ Look for external triggers, and be mindful of seemingly trivial things

Examples: the neighbor's alarm clock that goes off each night at 3.33am 🙄, temperature changing in the course of the night, your baby's diaper wet and/or your baby sensitive to it even being slightly moist, hunger, and similar

2/ Examine your baby's sleep schedule

And rather than compare your baby's schedule to 'prescribed schedules for this age', pay attention to how well the nap and bedtimes truly suit YOUR baby.

Be guided by avoiding over- and under-tiredness, trying to aim for the sweet spot. Allow yourselves plenty slack as well, you don't need a military-strict kind of schedule but rather a real-life doable routine.



3/ Carefully adjust timing

Once you've eliminated potential external triggers, you can carefully adjust timing to loosen the stuck patterns.

This can be with an adjusted sleep schedule (see above), adjusted feeding (at night) schedule, or with scheduled waking.

The former two techniques are recommended and sufficient for most babies and toddlers.

The latter, scheduled waking, is a technique to be used with care (!) as it involves waking a sleeping baby (you'd half-wake them about 10 minutes before their usual stuck-pattern waking, then help back to sleep asap, for several nights in a row, one waking at a time). Only do this one very carefully, ideally with guidance, and only if you feel confident that this is what's happening, and pause if it upsets your baby.

There's more we can do to tackle stuck sleep patterns individually - we regularly resolve stuck sleep patterns inside the Overcome Frequent Waking group - but these starting pointers should help you get started.

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